Dear guy driving big ugly van
Dear guy driving the big ugly van that tailgated me my entire commute home from work,
If you didn’t notice, it was snowing this afternoon. Also, if you didn’t notice, I was driving a crappy little Honda Civic. I’m not sure if you’ve ever driven a Honda Civic before but let me tell ya, they suck in the snow.
I am fully aware that I was driving a mere 30 miles per hour in a 30 MPH zone but if I drove any faster, I’d be risking a serious spin out and since you were so far up my rear end I find it hard to believe you’d be able to avoid hitting me when that happened. Also, I do not believe that risking life and limb is worth it just to appease you.
In closing, I’d like to ask that next time you DON’T drive so close that I can clearly watch you pick your nose in my rear view mirror.
Hate always,
Angela
P.S.
until the NFL Draft!
love this picture
A lot of business is conducted on and off the golf course. I have two golf sites http://www.golfblogger.co.uk and http://www.golfbargains4u.co.uk and I am looking for some feedback. Can you please provide me with feedback. thanks. Best Regards and Kindest Wishes Graham
That finger surely says it all….:-)
I thought it was understated.
Dear Tow-Truck Driver who nearly caused two accidents within a span of seconds on my commute home from work:
I was the Honda Civic in the middle lane before you merged onto me, forcing me into the fast lane. I honked and screamed FU while you continued to merge. In case you were wondering, I’m okay. No harm. No Foul, right?
But, I think you crossed the line when you accelerated back into the right lane shortly after our close encounter and then proceeded to the right shoulder in an attempt to pass a Corolla. I don’t think the Corolla driver was nearly as shocked as the cars in acceleration lane that the shoulder was about to become (and you were about to hit).
Yes, when you merged onto the Corolla, forcing him/her into the center lane, right in front of me, I dreamed of driving to your trailor-park and slaughtering your family of 15 mutants while the Corolla driver made a scurrilous comment about your mother.
But hey, you were in a hurry, right? You were on your way to buy chewing tobacco. No? Oh yeah, you don’t have any teeth left to hold the tobacco to your lip. Well, why else does a redneck tow-truck driver speed? That’s right, your tow-truck sense was going off. You were heading to campus downtown so you could steal a pretty young woman’s car and rub one out while you wait for her to show up to pay the fine.
Up yours truly,
Matty
This is a classic post! I love it!
It’s my first time checking out your blog. I really dig it! I like your sense of humor.
-Dave Q.
Matt, seeing as you are also a Honda driver, have you noticed how sadly wimpy the Honda horn is? I think that’s part of our problem. No one takes us seriously.
Thanks, Dave. It’s been a little quiet around here lately as I am still recovering from the tragic ending to my Pats’ season but I’ll be as good as new in no time!
What’s wrong with HONDA CIVICS? you should be proud of your Honda!!
This is excellent…gave me a good laugh. I drive a crappy little Nissan Sentra… even though it’s a small, crappy car….it gets 37 mpg… it give me a small bit of joy.
That was great. Hard to find a sense of humor on most blogs but you have that quality. I am really enjoying several of your posts. I am going to digg this one and try to give you some extra attention. You deserve it. Thanks for the laugh.
Great post. Very nice humor. I especially like the photo. It’s so cool. I gotta digg this one. Thanks for amusing us.
This one’s a classic! Really hilarious…
Woot! Woot!
LOL! I gotta plug this blog entry to my friends!
It’s so funny…