Figures, when the Patriots are having a huge free agency period I would have a poetry analysis essay due. How am I ever going to concentrate on modernist poetry (of all things) when the Patriots have finally pulled the trigger on one of the most asked questions of this offseason?! And by that I mean, Matt Cassel has been traded to the Kansas City Chiefs!

Of course with Bill Belichick on one end and Scott Pioli on the other, ZERO information is out about the details of this trade. It’s obvious now that Mike Vrabel was part of the equation.

I also have to note the irony that Kansas City is getting the quarterback who, if it weren’t for one of their defensive players knocking out Brady, would have remained in obscurity.

To all Kansas City fans, you guys have just gotten a GREAT linebacker, one who will lead your youth. He will be the on-field defensive equivalent of Tony Gonzalez. You also just got a quarterback who, while under IMMENSE scrutiny (it’s not like he was replacing just any Joe Schmo), succeeded and will only get better. Now, if you could just handle your dirtbag running back issue, you’d be all set.

What a busy NFL news day… Which is great considering I am languishing here at the office with little to do.

I think I speak for everyone when I say, “Holy $%*!@…!” Patriots linebacker Mike Vrabel is about to be traded to Kansas City! I knew that with Scott Pioli in Kansas City, the Patriots would have a new AFC buddy but I never in a million years thought Mike Vrabel was on the trading block. Wow! I’m just dumbfounded at the moment. Bill Belichick never ceases to amaze me. He always has something up his sleeve. This one just blew me away, that’s for sure.

I’m also bummed long snapper Lonie Paxton is on his way to Denver. He was the oft-forgotten element in all of Adam Viniateri’s “super” field goals.

Can’t wait to see what’s next!

Oh, Doug’s not gonna like this one….

Fred Taylor picks the Patriots. My dad’s psyched because he’s not a Maroney fan and he thinks this signals the end of Maroney’s time in New England. I think Taylor will be a great addition to the Morris/Faulk combo. It’s the new three-headed monster.

<3

On the eve of NFL Free Agency, Gisele Bundchen signed her top quarterback to a long-term deal.

I don’t really care about high school athletics with the exception of the schools I must cover for work. When playoff time comes, if the local teams win, I have more work to do (photos, stories, congratulatory ads). If they lose, then my work is done until the next sport season kicks off.

Tonight, the Everett High boys basketball team hosted the Brighton boys down the street from my office. Because we are in production tonight and the paper is, for the most part, done, we were getting calls from folks at the game updating us on the score. Our photographer was sending us action photos and more information because we are cool like that and just in time, the game ended with Everett victorious, I was able to enter the score into the paper and I met my deadline. Ah

After 12 hours of hellish non-stop work, I think I deserve a cigarette (spare me, anti-smoker-people). I went out for a cigarette, and low and behold, I saw the bus full of Brighton kids stopped at the streetlight in front of my office. They were tough to miss, the whole bus was in an uproar. The players were hanging out the window, screaming at everyone waiting at the nearby bus stop. And I mean screaming. Eff this, Eff you, Eff them, Effing Eff Eff, if you get my drift. I’m not so prudish as to have been offended by their rampant profanity directed at innocent bystanders. I chalked it up to them being teenagers and having just lost a playoff game.

BUT THEN, the light changed and the bus slowly began to roll past me. And as if it was in slow motion, the back of the bus erupted, turning their rage toward me. “You %*#$&%$ B! (I’m censoring this for my under-18 readers.)” “Effing Eff, you Effing see you next Thursday.”

Oh no they didn’t!

Listen, brats. You got your butts handed to you tonight. The least you could do is go home with a little dignity and not harass every person you see walking (or smoking a cigarette after a hellish 12-hours of non-stop work) on the street.

I’d hope the Everett kids would have had a little more class if the role was reversed.