Face it, you probably did something totally dick-ish today. Maybe you were on the train and refused to give up your seat to the 95-year-old woman who had just boarded the train. Or maybe you cut-off someone on the highway and flipped them off as you sped away. There’s a good chance you stiffed your waitress at lunch. Something. In this day and age, it’s nearly impossible to NOT be an asshole.

So, do yourself a favor and try to earn back some of the good karma you pissed away today. And what kind of pal would I be if I didn’t offer you a chance at redemption!? By that I mean, my sister is participating in the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer and she could really use your help. Here’s her personal walk page. She has a lot of money to raise just to participate and a limited amount of time to raise it. If you could spare any amount of money, even a measly dollar, it would be greatly appreciated. Seriously. I never forget a favor. Ever.

You see, Breast Cancer has affected our family, as it will yours, if it hasn’t already, of course.

So guys, instead of buying drinks for skanks at the bar this weekend – skanks who probably wouldn’t talk to you anyway – spend that $5 on something vitally important. Think of it this way, that five-spot would still be going toward boobies, right?