After many phone calls and much aggravation, we were finally able to locate two 14″ rims at a giant junkyard in Leominster. A hundred bucks got us the rims and delivery.

Check out my dope new gangster rims:

Tight, right? They only look as though they’ve been vomited on two or three times. I know you’re totally jealous.

I’m debating on whether I should even put my hubcaps back on or leave these babies out.

Who would have thunk it. For the first time in my life, I have a car that doesn’t break down on a bi-weekly basis yet it is constantly victimized like a hot chick in a seedy dive bar. Son of a gun, I woke up this morning to find my car on blocks (I’m so angry even curse words are escaping me; I am now using expressions like ’son of a gun’ and ‘yabba dabba doo’).

Gone are my two driver’s side tires and rims. I am now the proud owner of two beautiful chunks of wood. I think I’m going to make good use of my new possessions. I haven’t quite decided what to do with them yet but I’m considering hurling them off the Tobin Bridge.

My dad says I should be thankful the thieves were kind enough to leave my car on blocks of wood and not just on the pavement. I think, if anything, the thieves should be thankful that I was sound asleep, happily dreaming about the NFL draft and other awesome things because I can promise you, I would have done something crazy had I heard my car’s tires being stolen. My dad does have a samurai sword collection, you know.

The joke’s on them though because they stole two, balder-than-Matt-Hasselbeck tires with over 100,000 miles on ‘em and left my brand-spankin’ new right side tires alone. But I’m pretty sure it was the rims they were after and not tires and I know this by the remarkable difficulty I’ve had in locating used rims to replace the two stolen ones.

What I was able to find were wheel locking lug nuts because my dad fears the thieves will return for the other two tires tonight. It really pisses me off that I have to use wheel locks to protect standard, factory-issued rims. I’d feel justified if I had some flashy, gansta rims to protect. Word to all the late 90s Honda Civic owners… invest in WHEEL LOCKS!

I’m also considering investing in a pit bull. I’ll tie him to my car every night and place a piece of steak just outside of his reach just to make him extra mad. I’d like to see someone go after my car then.

My boyfriend has a lot to say and I’ve been trying to get him to start his own blog FOREVER. Well, he’s starting to listen to me and to get his feet wet, he’s going to write some stuff here! Today, he will be ranting about some folks he saw on the bus this morning. Make him feel welcome! That means leave comments. –Angela

One thing I can’t stand is people that start wearing their sandals, half shirts, shorts, and flip flops the first 59 degree day that’s not raining in April. It’s not summertime yet. Nor is the weather nice enough. You have May, June, July, August, and half of September to wear all that shit.

I don’t need an extra two and half months of looking at your winterized, crusty feet and toes, jammed into a pair of wooden strapped Jesus sandals as if you were on your way to vote for Julius Caesar and buy yourself a soda with pieces of eight.

Ladies, it’s way too early for that butterfly tattoo around your bellybutton to come out. Leave it in its cocoon a little longer.

And guys, with your tight jean shorts, there’ll be plenty of time to show the world 87 different ways to make shamrocks and your old “Bud Man” tattoos on your chalky, white calves.

This means you too to the guys in the shorts that go down to your ankles. Just because we can’t see your corny tattoos because you hide them by wearing jeans made for midgets as shorts.

And one more thing, flip flops are for beaches, around the pool area, and showering prison inmates. Not to go along with your outfit for work so I’m not confronted with the aroma and sight of your Jimmy Dean toes sizzling in the sun nice and early on the morning bus ride.

P.S. Good thing I skipped breakfast this morning.

When I heard the Montreal Canadiens fans booing the “Star-Spangled Banner” in unison last night, I thought to myself, “C’mon Bruins, give ‘em something to really boo about.” Thanks, Bruins. That was awesome. I haven’t been this excited about hockey since the 1998 USA Women’s Olympic Team (Sandra Whyte is from my hometown).

Best of all, the game ended just in time to catch Ray Allen’s two-seconds-left three-pointer to lift the Celtics over the Bulls in Game Two. All this after I spent my afternoon listening to the Sox score 12 runs over hapless Baltimore.

But it all got me to thinking (I know, ouch, my brain hurts), if the Bruins were able to go on and win the Cup, ending their 35+ year championship drought that would mean the team with the longest period of time since its last championship would be… gasp… the Patriots. Could that even be possible?

Happy Patriots’ Day to all my fellow Massholes and Maine-iacs. Patriots’ Day is one of my favorite holidays of the year, and it has nothing to do with the fact that my favorite thing in the whole world (New England Patriots) seeing as I am a geeky history buff. I am forever fascinated by the events of April 19, 1775

As usual, I am not given a Monday holiday off, but I think I’ve bitched about that more than enough. If anything, I am going to use this opportunity of being in a silent office to catch up on my knitting and my homework.

I might even squeeze in a few newspaper-related items but that’s only if things come in, of course. That’s the numero uno drawback of my job… it hinges on the work of others (e.g. graphic designers who send in their ads; writers who email their stories on time). Since most of them have today off, I’m left with only what the real go-getters sent me on Friday.