Waiting tables sucks. No matter what way you look at it. It is the worst fucking job out there, but sadly it is the best paying job I could get right now. Basically the job description is ‘’serving” people and having those people pay you with a tip. So in other words, I am forced to kiss some fucking asshole’s butt for 45 minutes to an hour so they will give me a cheesy fucking 15% tip (if I’m lucky).

First and foremost, people are awful tippers. God forbid they actually PAY for the service they receive. Most servers are only paid $2.63 an hour in hopes that people actually tip 15% of their total food bill. HA! 15%? If you’re lucky. I knew a lot of people were frugal, but I didn’t realize the extent of cheapness in our society, maybe it is just this area, but I highly doubt that. Customers will hand you a $2 tip and look at you as if they are doing you a favor, ”Thank you sir for this wonderful 10% tip! I can finally put the down payment on my brand-new Porsche!” Fucking please!

Bad tippers wouldn’t piss me off so badly if I felt I deserved a shitty tip. We all have bad days at work, and when I totally fuck up on an order, a bad tip is expected, even though the majority of the time it is a kitchen mess up and not my own. But if you get good service, at least a 20% tip is in order.

Besides the bad tipping issue, management at restaurants treats their wait staff like utter shit. Seriously though, it’s not like it is that difficult to replace one lowly waitress. A monkey could do the fucking job for crying out loud. At my restaurant, for example, we are treated so badly, new hires usually only last about two weeks. One or two out of 25 will actually last longer than that.

This is why I felt such an urgent need to get back into school. I DO NOT plan on being a waitress for the rest of my life. I would rather kill myself than live a lifetime of refilling coffee and returning undercooked steaks to the kitchen.

February 25th, 2002