Since I am a daily North Station Orange Line commuter, I was intrigued when I first heard about this the other day. It hit a whole new level once the video was released this afternoon. Girl gets hammered. Girl tries to take train. Girl falls onto track in front of oncoming train. Girl DOESN’T die. This photo doesn’t do the situation justice. In order to fully grasp the event, you must watch the video (preferably Video #3).

Things that are wrong with this situation:
1.) The girl is so drunk, she can barely stand.
2.) She’s smoking on the platform, another no-no.
3.) The girl is completely shitfaced, yet she is completely alone. I can’t even begin to explain how dangerous THAT alone is.

This girl is BEYOND lucky that a.) there were enough good samaritans there to wave down the conductor and b.) the conductor had the presence of mind to stop the train in time or else she’d be a shredded mess of a former human being.

As if nearly dying weren’t enough, the girl now has to face the public humiliation of having this incident plastered all over the news. I just hope she learned her lesson. Probably not, though.

ADDENDUM: And just like that, our very own drunk girl went international.

It’s not even 8 a.m. and I’ve already had an interesting day. Things I’ve witnessed so far this morning:

• Some dude brushing his teeth while driving. That’s a new one. I’ve heard of applying make-up, reading the newspaper, texting… but brushing your teeth? Where and, more importantly, how do you spit it out?
• Some fuckface on the Orange Line sitting in the middle of the car. At first I thought he might have fallen over. Nope. He actually CHOSE to sit on the floor. And not only sit on the floor, sit on the floor in a packed car AND in front of the door. I thought some other dude was going to kick him when floor guy wouldn’t budge at a stop, thus blocking him from exiting. I wish he had.
• A dead canary on the sidewalk in Kendall Square. Didn’t coal miners use canaries to signify poisonous air or something like that? Either way, how the heck does a dead one end up on a random sidewalk?

I wonder how my day will go…