I went on job interview Numero Tres yesterday morning, this time meeting with an HR specialist. Of course, no matter how well I did, beating out the internal candidate that also applied for this position is going to be tough.

Aside from the steep challenge of getting a job over an insider, I think this experience has given me the ability to hone my interviewing skills and I’ve quickly learned the most difficult part of the interview is NOT talking a boatload of shit about my current employers. That’s hard. Especially when the conversations always gravitate toward how badly I am being treated by my current employers.

Even when I am trying to remain positive and not say anything bad and a professional human resources specialist STILL tells me that she thinks my employer should be fined, it makes me rethink returning to work at all, even without a new job offer.

I do talk about my job here on this website but I try to keep the most gritty details off the internet, instead funneling them into the ears of anyone willing to listen.

This particular gripe involves the 1099s I was given for years, not knowing how illegal they were. I was being paid as an independent contractor when I was anything but. And I still owe the IRS thousands of dollars in taxes that my EMPLOYER should have been paying. So, in retaliation for my new revelation, I’ve decided to go into work late today (by choice!). I think I may do this until I have fully paid the IRS, or until I find a new job, whichever comes first.

Sometimes it just takes seeing a situation with fresh eyes to give you a new perspective on things.

It’s Wednesday which means it is also my most dreaded day of the week. 16 hours in the office with no break, slammed with work while my boss hangs out in his office updating his status on Facebook (They’re time-stamped, dummy!).

So, during my weekly pity party, I thought up a few things that I would find more desirable than spending the day at work “in production”. They are:

1.) Sit through “Barney Live.”

2.) Be arrested.

3.) Have my pinky finger chopped off.

4.) Work at McDonalds.

5.) Have explosive diarrhea…

6.) …with no T.P.

7.) Read every single blog on Myspace.

8.) Spend 16 hours in a room filled with Yankees and Jets fans.

9.) Eat a tub of cottage cheese.

10.) Undergo a transvaginal ultrasound.

Happy Patriots’ Day to all my fellow Massholes and Maine-iacs. Patriots’ Day is one of my favorite holidays of the year, and it has nothing to do with the fact that my favorite thing in the whole world (New England Patriots) seeing as I am a geeky history buff. I am forever fascinated by the events of April 19, 1775

As usual, I am not given a Monday holiday off, but I think I’ve bitched about that more than enough. If anything, I am going to use this opportunity of being in a silent office to catch up on my knitting and my homework.

I might even squeeze in a few newspaper-related items but that’s only if things come in, of course. That’s the numero uno drawback of my job… it hinges on the work of others (e.g. graphic designers who send in their ads; writers who email their stories on time). Since most of them have today off, I’m left with only what the real go-getters sent me on Friday.

Amid a crappy economy, I somehow managed to finagle a job interview. Yay me! (Or “Yay” my sister’s boyfriend who got me the in.) But, I won’t get too excited because from what I hear there are 100 other applicants. I’m hoping my stunningly awesome personality will set me apart from the most likely much more qualified competition. HA HA!

And it couldn’t come a moment too soon because my job now is sucking the life out of me. For reals. I’ve lost my passion for everything I once enjoyed – knitting, writing, my boyfriend – all I want to do now is sit on the couch and watch crappy reality TV shows like the “Bad Girls Club.” It’s only a matter of time until I’m watching “The Bachelor,” covered in empty Ben & Jerry’s pints while drooling on myself. Yeah, it’s THAT bad.

I know I should be thankful I even have a job, blah blah blah, but this job is on a fast track to killing me. Literally. I’ve grown to hate every aspect of my job and with no vacation days, personal days, sick days, or holi-days to recoup and recover, I’ve become a giant burn-out. I’ve been considering alcoholism as a remedy but I can’t afford the booze, what with cigarettes now $8 per pack.

Yesterday may have been my breaking point when I discovered my paycheck bounced and instead of trying to rectify the situation, by bosses dilly-dallied, BSed, and dragged their feet. Don’t forget, I am the ONLY employee. If they were having trouble with payroll, they could have easily talked to me about it and we could have worked something out instead of doing nothing and leaving my bank account severely overdrawn and wracked with overdraft fees.

I was promised that a new check including overdraft fees would be cut for me today so we’ll see but so help me god, I am one tiny aggravation away from meltdown. Especially since it’s not just my money they’re fucking with now, it’s my boyfriend’s, too, and heaven knows you really don’t want to mess with my boyfriend and his money. He’s one mean mother-effer when it comes to his money. I really don’t want to send him and my dad into my office to shake down my bosses.

But anyway, wish me luck! I’m gonna need it.

For kicks, I’ve decided to keep a tally of every time my boss says the “F” word, which is a lot, by the way. Sometimes, he uses the F word in between every word in his sentences. And a few weeks back, I got an email from an advertiser intended for him in which said advertiser wrote, “Why do you cuss so much?”

I’m not saying I don’t swear but I at least can refrain when I’m at work – sort of. I just scream swear words in my head. He, on the other hand, constantly blurts ‘em out. Not to sound like a prude but it’s obnoxious. Don’t you think?

He was in the office today for a grand total of 30 minutes and I heard him drop F-bombs 15 times.

The true test will come Wednesday when he is in the office all day long.